Two Kinds of Kindness

The Kindness of Strangers

When my husband and I were planning our trip to Spain, part of what we discussed was the Spanish attitude towards breastfeeding, since our son was still in the nursing stage of babyhood. My husband lived in Spain for two years about 20 years ago. At that time, breastfeeding was associated with gypsy culture and was looked down on. I was a little nervous about nursing our baby in Spain, particularly because we would be out and in public as we toured the various museums and other attractions.

Aside from three older women glaring at me in Toledo, I didn’t have any negative experiences with nursing our baby in Spain. I did have two experiences where kindness was shown to me, and I am very grateful for that kindness.

Traveling with small children requires keeping track of many small details. The first Sunday that we were in Spain, we decided to go to church. Once we got there, I realized that I had forgotten to put my nursing cover in my bag. While I know there are many women who are comfortable nursing in public without a cover, I am not one of them. We were sitting down in church and my baby was hungry, and growing louder and louder in his desire to nurse. Another young mother loaned me her nursing cover so that I could feed my baby, diffusing what could have been a very stressful and difficult situation. My baby happily nursed under the borrowed cover until he was fully satisfied and happily drowsy. This small kindness from a kind stranger meant a lot to me.

Several days later we were shopping at Cortez Ingles when my little guy again needed to nurse. I had my cover with me this time, but was having a difficult time finding a comfortable place to nurse him. In American department stores the women’s restroom often has a section with comfortable seating that makes an excellent, quiet place to nurse a baby. So, I headed for the nearest restroom. By this time my baby was very fussy. There was no seating, and I didn’t want to sit on the floor, so I ended up sitting on the counter to nurse. A woman came into the bathroom and started speaking to me in Spanish. When I told her I didn’t understand her, that I didn’t speak Spanish, she switched to English. She told me she would find out if there was a more comfortable place for me to nurse my baby. She left the restroom and came back several minutes later. She had inquired with the staff at Cortez Ingles, and discovered that the third floor had a comfortable nursing area. While my little guy was almost finished at this time, I was touched by the kindness of this stranger, who went out of her way to make my situation more comfortable.

I had felt some anxiety about nursing our baby in Spain, but this actually brought me two wonderful reminders about the kindness of strangers when in a strange land. Spain is a country filled with kind people. And if you ever need to nurse at Cortez Ingles in Madrid, you know where to find the nursing room.

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The Gardens: A Feast for the Eyes

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We live in the desert. When we go to our botanical garden, we see cacti, succulents, and all sorts of interesting desert plants. In Madrid, the botanical garden is quite different. There are tall, shady trees. There are fountains and ponds. And of course, there is a wide variety of plant life that we just don’t get to see at home. It was a feast for our eyes, and a tranquil place to explore near the end of the day when our children were tired of museums and just wanted to run around enjoying the outdoors. Our two year old moved from spot to spot drawing interesting shapes in the dirt. The older two girls ran around, climbing on rocks and fountains, tenderly touching flower petals, and jumping off the benches. It was a great way to end a day of site seeing.

I really love the idea of gardens in the middle of busy cities like Madrid. In New York, Central Park is a haven to experience nature in the midst of a major metropolitan city. Boston’s Public Gardens are a beautiful juxtaposition to the gritty city outside its gates. Madrid’s Botanical Gardens offer the same respite from the busy city. Here are some of my favorite photographs of the gardens.

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DSC_0220What are your favorite public gardens? If you live in a city, where do you go to experience nature?

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Madrid: The Prado, Medieval Art

I must admit, in the past I have not really enjoyed medieval art. In the Met in New York, the medieval section was just an area to walk through as quickly as possible. Never did I feel the urge to linger and gaze upon medieval art there. It always felt too dark, too sombre. The human figure was not as exact as in later Renaissance art. Medieval art seemed to be very expressionless to me.

The Prado in Madrid was a completely different experience. Maybe it is because Spain was the world power during medieval times. Maybe medieval artists working in Spain were more skilled at their craft. Maybe it’s because I am a different person now. The medieval art in the Prado was my favorite section of the museum.

Beautiful canvas after beautiful canvas in deep, rich colors celebrated the life of Christ and other religious figures. The paintings provided an opportunity for me to speak to my children about scripture stories, the story of Christmas, and the importance religion played in the history of Spain. The rich visual material piqued their interest. While I’m glad that the scriptures are now available for all to read, I appreciate how these vivid depictions of scriptural content sparked conversations and learning opportunities.

What really spoke to me personally in the medieval art, were the many paintings of Mary nursing baby Jesus. Since I am currently nursing a baby boy, it makes sense that I would have a more personal connection with the subject matter. What really impressed me was the gentleness and tenderness that was portrayed in the relationship between mother and child.

Painting after beautiful painting showed the loving bond shared by mother and child. I have always thought of medieval times as somewhat austere and stern. In some ways, they probably were. But the natural relationship of mother and small baby was regarded as natural and beautiful. It drew me in and touched me. What a beautiful thing it is to care for and nurture a child! It can be daunting, frustrating, tiring, and sometimes monotonous. But tender moments bring joy greater than any of the negative feelings that sometimes come.

So hooray for medieval art and the Prado! If you don’t go, you will be missing out on a beautiful visual treasure.

Madrid: A Princess Palace for Aeryn

El Palacio Real, Madrid

El Palacio Real, Madrid

Princesses, fairies, mermaids, unicorns! If your little girls are anything like our little girls, they love to dress up and make up games using these personas. I love how vividly their imaginations work, and how creative they are in their stories. But for our little Aeryn, age two, it is more than just make believe. She truly believes that she is a princess.

We chose to visit the Royal Palace on our first full day in Madrid. Our children were still jet lagged, and we needed some interest on their part to motivate them to explore with us. They perked up noticeably at the prospect of visiting a palace. So we hopped on the subway and traveled up to Puerta del Sol. Then we walked down Calle del Arenal, past Teatro Real, to find the Royal Palace.

Beautiful gardens in the Plaza de Oriente decorate the approach to the palace. Statues of Gothic kings line the walkway that leads to the front entrance.

Plaza de Oriente, Madrid

The Palacio Real is one of the attractions you can visit using the Madrid card. The entrance in the front by the gardens is used exclusively by tour groups and Madrid card holders. There was no line when we got there, so we were able to go right in. There is some security, a metal detector and guards which will search your bags before entering the open courtyard.

The palace is beautiful. It was built in the 1700’s, to replace the old castle destroyed in a fire. The beauty of this palace was in part inspired by the beauty of the palace of Versailles. The weapons room is especially impressive. All of our children liked visiting the palace, but the most enthralled by it all was Aeryn.

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Here are Lexi, our babysitter, and our little Aeryn posing on the balcony overlooking Casa de Campo. This is one of Aeryn’s princess poses. The lifting of her heal and downcast eyes are very deliberate on her part. She will often clasp her hands together to complete the pose.

After enjoying the view, we went back into the main courtyard. Aeryn started talking about her palace. “It’s my princess castle, mama.” “I love my princess castle, mama.” Such beautiful, bubbly expressions poured out of her! Then, Abigail, who is 5 and has somehow decided that she is the enforcer, told her that it is not her palace, and she is not a princess! What came next? Tears and screaming. Aeryn, with her little fists clenched and tears streaming down her cheeks yelled at Abigail. “I am a princess! It’s my castle!” With Abigail yelling back, “No, you’re not! You’re not a princess!”

My husband and I have wondered about how long our children will remain in that magical state of make believe where fairies and magic are real. Our oldest daughter is seven, and she truly believes that fairies are real. She builds communities for them to visit in our backyard. She makes treasures for them. She blissfully gathers flowers for them. At some point all of our little ones will transition to skeptical teenagers and young adults, but for now, we want the magic to last for them.

So, with Abigail and Aeryn we talked about how they are not princesses of a country, but they are princesses in our family. We were visiting a palace that belonged to the King and Queen of Spain. Abigail and Aeryn both calmed down and seemed happy with that explanation. I guess Abigail had felt jealous and a little excluded. She really just wanted to be a princess, too.

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Spain: Modern and Medieval

Spain: Modern and Medieval

Plaza Mayor, Madrid

Plaza Mayor, Madrid

Our family recently returned from an amazing two and a half week adventure in Spain. Reading the guidebook prior to our trip, I was amused that many of the smaller towns were described as “medieval”. My husband had visited Spain before, while it was the first time for the rest of us. I mentioned to him that many towns in Spain are described as medieval, and asked him if that was true. My experience in Spain taught me that yes, many towns are gorgeous remnants of medieval art and architecture. Yet, the larger cities had a distinctly modern and cosmopolitan feel.

This is the route we took on our journey through Spain. We flew into the capitol city of Madrid. From there we journeyed north to a small town called Santillana del Mar, about a 30 minute bus ride from Santander. If you want medieval, Santillana del Mar is a beautiful village protected as a UNESCO World Heritage Site. We then spent a few beach days in the coastal city of Santander. From Santander, we journeyed to Bilbao. Bilbao was once an industrial city, but is now a more modern and updated city, with the Guggenheim Museum showcasing modern art. From Bilbao, we took the train to Segovia. Isabella and Ferdinand reigned over a unified Spain and much of the new world from Segovia, before moving their capitol to Toledo. From Segovia, we headed back to Madrid for a day or two before flying home.

I will be sharing our trip with you in more detail, but here are some general impressions that I had while in Spain.

The Spanish people are friendly and inviting. Traveling with four children can be a bit stressful and difficult at times. People were always volunteering to help carry strollers in and out of the metro, hold open doors, and helping in any way they saw possible. Madrid was especially refreshing. We lived in New York City and then the surrounding area for quite a few years. I love New York, but it is not especially friendly to children. Madrid had many of the qualities that I love about New York; the wide boulevards, the museums, the parks, great restaurants, but was welcoming to children everywhere we went. In Spain, children are included in all aspects of daily life. That aspect of Spanish culture mirrors closely how my husband and I raise our children, which made for a very comfortable atmosphere. Madrid is also relatively inexpensive and has better weather than New York. We plan on spending more time there in the future.

If traveling in Spain, it is a very good idea to speak some Spanish. My husband warned me before we went, but I was still surprised that many people did not speak any English. Even in Madrid, there was very little English spoken. My husband speaks Spanish, which made our trip go a lot more smoothly. At the very least, bring a good phrasebook with you to use during your trip.

Spanish food can be quite amazing. It can also be quite different than what you might be used to. I admit, I do not have a very adventurous palate. I only recently in the past few years started eating any seafood at all. And I like my meat to be well cooked. Some of the areas of Spain were challenging for me. If you order a hamburger, there’s a good chance that it will still be bleeding in the center. If you order seafood, it will be easily recognizable as fish (most likely the head will be attached) or as octopus (the tentacles will still have suction cups on it). If you follow a vegetarian diet, there are very few options for you at most restaurants. If you follow a vegan diet, you might have to subsist on bread the entire time you are in Spain. My general impression of Spanish food is that Spaniards like meat. They like it raw, with maybe a few vegetables in tow. Our children survived by eating a lot of cereal and ice cream. And churros con chocolate.

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Still, with all the challenges of guiding our family across the ocean and through a new country, we had an amazing experience learning about modern Spain and its medieval past. It felt at times that we had taken a time machine back 600 years. We saw Roman ruins more impressive than those we saw in Rome itself. We saw amazing works of art that spanned thousands of years. History came alive for our children. And the warm welcome we received is sure to lure us back to Spain again.

The Best Jungle Cruise

Disneyland Hong Kong Castle

Disneyland Hong Kong Castle

After our recent trip to Disneyworld, I’ve been thinking about all our trips to Disney Parks. I fondly remember our trip to Disneyland in Hong Kong. It is a smaller park than the other Disney parks we’ve been to, although it has undergone an expansion since we were there in 2011. It is much less crowded than the other Disney parks. And, there is the added fun travel factor of hearing and seeing Chinese everywhere in the park.

There is one thing that Disneyland Hong Kong does better than all the other Disney parks we’ve been to. The Jungle Cruise. Disneyland California has the classic version. Disneyworld in Florida has an upgraded version with an ancient temple you travel through in addition to the classic elements. Disneyworld Hong Kong has an awesome surprise ending. Do you want to know what it is? Watch a video of it here.

Isn’t it an amazing end to the ride? We were not expecting it when we first rode the Jungle Cruise. You can feel the heat of the flames shooting out of the rock formations, and it is hot! The Jungle Cruise was our favorite thing in Hong Kong Disneyland.

There were a couple of other great surprises in store for us, too. During the parades, they will actually invite some of the children to dance in the parade with some of the characters. Our oldest daughter was able to dance in the luau section of the parade.

752She was a little nervous at the time, but so happy she did it afterwards! Where else do you get a chance to dance in a Disney parade? I think we might have to go back and do it again when she is older so she will actually remember the experience, instead of just seeing it in pictures. Since Hong Kong itself is a great destination, I don’t think I’ll have a hard time convincing the rest of the family that we need to go back.

In all the parts of Hong Kong we visited, people loved to take pictures with our kids, of our kids, sometimes they would just pick them up and hold them. This was especially true at Disneyland. Our youngest at the time had very blond hair. I remember waiting in the line for Winnie the Pooh, and people kept passing her down the line so they could all have turns to take pictures with her. A little unnerving, but thankfully everyone was really sweet to our children the entire time we were there.

726So, for an amazing Jungle Cruise experience, and a whole lot of other fun, take a day or two to visit Hong Kong Disneyland if you’re in the area.

Long Live the Doman Sun!

I always find it amazing how family jokes and memories grow until they sometimes have their own identity. A catchword or catchphrase will be created and become a key to unlock a treasure chest full of memories and experiences that each member of the family cherishes.

The first time our family went to Disneyworld our oldest daughter was two, and her younger sister was only six weeks old. My husband had a job interview in Orlando, so we decided to go to Disneyworld for just one day. It was a very cold, blustery January day, and the park was very empty. It’s a Small World never had a long line. We could almost just walk onto the ride. Because our two year old loved it, and because it was much warmer inside riding the ride, we rode it something like eight times that day.

Our two year old was a very advanced speaker for her age. After our trip to Disneyworld, we would hear her singing “It’s a Small World” to herself. We noticed something a little peculiar. Every time she got to the part about the golden sun, she would sing doman (sounds like doe-man, with a stress on the first syllable). She was very consistent.

The Golden Sun from It's a Small World Ride, Disneyworld, courtesy of themeparks.about.com

The Golden Sun from It’s a Small World Ride, Disneyworld, courtesy of
themeparks.about.com

After a while, we asked her why she was singing doman, instead of golden. She very seriously informed us that the sun was “doman colored”, not golden. We told her we had never heard of doman colored. What does it look like? She said it has a little bit of golden in it. It took us months to convince her that the song actually said golden sun. It was a little sad to see her finally accept that the line is “golden sun”.

Fast forward about five years, and our family recently returned to Disneyworld. Our children love to hear stories about themselves, and we love to tell them. So, while we were at Disneyworld we told the story of the doman colored sun. Now seven years old, she thought it was hilarious. And her five year old sister was tickled by the whole thing.

We returned home from Disneyworld, and one day I found our five-year old looking at the book “The Day the Crayons Quit”. In the book, yellow crayon and orange crayon are mad and not speaking to each other. They each think they are the color of the sun, and cite evidence of when they were used to color the sun as rational for their behavior. I came into the room, and she turned and looked at me. Then she said, “Mom, the yellow crayon and orange crayon are so silly.” At this point, I was expecting her to say something about how their fighting was silly, since we had been talking a lot lately about how people fight about lots of silly things. But no, she continues on very seriously with an exasperated air, “Don’t they know the sun is doman colored?”

And the doman sun lives on.

Disneyworld: Fastpass Plus, Good or Bad?

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Photo courtesy of themeparkuniversity.com


For this particular trip to Disneyworld, we stayed in one of the resorts. Everyone who visits Disneyworld has access to the new Fastpass Plus system. The advantage to staying in one of the resorts is up to three months prior to your trip, you can select your Fastpass choices through MyDisneyExperience.com. Fastpass had changed to this new system from the last time we were at Disneyworld, and we didn’t quite know the best way to use it. So, here are some things we learned, some things we liked, and some things we didn’t like about the new fast pass plus.

Under the new system, you can make up to three Fastpass selections for each day of your Disneyworld trip. You can either use kiosks at the parks, or use MyDisneyExperience.com. Your Fastpass selections must all be in the same park for that particular day. Our Fastpass selections were spaced fairly close together, so we still had the option of going to a different park for the rest of the day if we wanted. Fastpass gives approximately an hour window for you to use it, or you lose it. You activate your Fastpass entrance by using either a magic band or park ticket. There are always two places on each ride you must scan your Fastpass, at the entrance to the Fastpass line and just prior to joining the stand-by line.

For new and extremely popular attractions, such as the new Seven Dwarves Mine Train ride, you have to book your fast pass as soon as possible. We were not aware of the ability to select Fastpasses so far in advance, so the Seven Dwarves Mine Train ride and Meet Elsa and Anna were no longer available by the time we made our selections. Fastpass was still available for popular thrill rides such as Space Mountain and Aerosmith’s Rockin’ Rollercoaster.

What I did like about the Fastpass was the guarantee that there were at least three must-do attractions on our list everyday that we didn’t have to spend a long time in line for. In our case, this was especially helpful since part of our party (children too small to ride the faster thrill rides or grandparents with health issues that prevented them from riding) couldn’t go on some of our fast pass selections. We could get the children a snack, like Mickey Mouse ice cream bars, go ride the ride, and get back by the time they were finished with their snack. This prevented several meltdowns because they needed some down time, and allowed my husband and I to ride several rides together without children in tow. It was like a mini-date! For us, that was a win-win situation.

The Fastpass Plus system also insured that at least three of our favorite attractions were easily accessible without a long wait. The longest line I think we stood in for anything during our trip was 35 minutes for the Winnie the Pooh, which we did not have Fastpass for. We felt like we were able to see and do a lot during each day of our trip.

Perusing the Fastpass selection also prompted us to do some things we might not have otherwise thought of doing. We met Mickey Mouse at Town Hall. I never would have thought of seeking out that opportunity, but it was our youngest daughter’s favorite experience from the trip. She still walks around saying, “Mickey Mouse hugged Aeryn!” What a magical moment it was for her! Even the grandparents had a great time meeting Mickey Mouse. He even sounded like Mickey.

Mickey Mouse Hugging Aeryn!

Mickey Mouse Hugging Aeryn!

What I did not like about Fastpass was the spontaneity it removed from our trip. There always had to be some planning involved, especially with such a large group, but it seemed that our days were planned directly in response to our Fastpass selection. We also lost some of the flexibility often necessary with young children. When they need the bathroom, or food, or some time to sit and look at the flowers, they need it now. They really don’t care if you have a fast pass that expires in the next half an hour. We didn’t use several of our Fastpasses because of situations like this. We also lost using one or two because they were assigned early in the morning. My family does not do early in the morning. At least the majority doesn’t, and it is much harder to convince night owls to wake up early than it is to convince early risers to stay out a little later. That caused some frustration and bad feelings, and made it more difficult to spend time with one pair of grandparents who are more on the get up and go side of the scale.

Overall, I appreciate the opportunity to have some short wait times during the day. I am glad that Fastpass is an option when visiting Disneyworld. I think you have to be okay with not always using your Fastpass if the children would rather do something else during that time, and I am curious how well the Fastpass system works when the parks are really crowded. We had moderate crowds during our time there.

What are your experiences with Fastpass?

Disneyworld: Why Do We Love It So Much?

“Our Family Vacation”

Our family went to a magical place

With princesses, pirates, and journeys through space

We had fun galore

And left wanting more

We made memories we’ll always embrace

IMG_4042We love Disneyworld! We love the rides, the shows, the resorts, and the magical feeling that permeates our Disneyworld vacations. Our love of Disneyworld has always seemed contradictory to our regular travel style and preferences. When we travel we don’t like tours, unless it is specific to one thing we want to see that day. We shy away from “packaged getaways”. We always try to learn at least a few phrases of the language from our destination countries. We like to learn about the culture, to be immersed in the culture, to be a tourist without seeming too touristy. In fact, a lot of places we travel I get mistaken for a native and spoken to in their native tongue. Greek in Greece. Italian in Italy. Spanish in Peru and Mexico. Hong Kong was the exception, because I don’t look the least bit like a Chinese woman. I tease my husband that we need to travel to more of the Nordic countries, because there is no way I would be mistaken for a Swede or a Norwegian. Two of our daughters might, in part because I have developed a fondness for Scandinavian children’s clothing. But even if I were decked out head to toe in designer Swedish clothing, I would still be an average sized brunette with curly hair and slightly olive skin. But we would still try to absorb the culture and experience of the everyday Scandinavian, regardless of how much we did or did not resemble one. That is part of the joy of traveling to new places.

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If we enjoy so much experiencing the cultures of the world, why we would love the fabricated world of Disney so much? And then, I suddenly understood. Disney has truly developed their own very specific culture, founded upon the wonder of childhood and magical stories that make people feel that childlike magic even as an adult. Disney attends to even the smallest details, so when you visit one of their parks, it is like walking into another country. It is a magical faraway land where wonder and mystery awaits, but that is simultaneously familiar and comfortable. The characters in the shows and parades are like old friends, familiar and dear to our hearts. Aeryn could not contain her excitement when we met Mickey Mouse. She still randomly tells me, “Mickey Mouse hugged Aeryn” as we go through out our days. Rapunzel told the older girls a secret when we met her. Abigial and Alyssa talk about the secret together, but not with me. You can tell they feel very important sharing a secret with Rapunzel.  When we travel to Disneyworld, we embrace the culture of Disney in the same way that we embrace the culture of any country that we visit.

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This Disneyworld vacation was especially memorable because we were joined by both sets of grandparents. Watching children experience the magic of Disney makes the entire experience more fun and rewarding. When my husband and I were first married without children, we went to Disneyland. The rides were fun, but we didn’t feel the same sense of wonder and magic as we do now, watching our children seeing their favorite characters come to life. I am so glad that the grandparents were able to have this experience with their grandchildren!